December 10, 2004

No More Stolen Elections!

I know you're all tired of hearing about this, but it's crunch time and slacking off would be fatal.

That little beady red rat eyed punk Patterico pulled ahead of me in the Wizbang blog awards. He's bribing people for votes, spreading rumors about me and women's underpants, and is almost certainly otherwise rigging the system.

Meryl Yourish is in third place. She emailed me and said she would form an alliance with him to gang up on me, then betray him in the end. Well, Meryl, that betrayal had better come fast.

Thousands of people cruise by this site everyday. If every one of you takes just a few seconds to go on over there and vote for me I'll whoop 'em both by a fat whopping margin.

So come on, dearly beloved fans and antagonists. Help me out here. My gigantic ego depends on it. Vote for me. Early, late, and frequently.

Cheers. And cheers to you, too, Patterico and Meryl. You're alright - as long as you lose!

Posted by Michael J. Totten at December 10, 2004 06:13 PM


Posted by: Grant McEntire at December 10, 2004 08:43 PM


Nevermind, just vote for me!

Posted by: Michael J. Totten at December 10, 2004 08:52 PM

Done as directed Obi-wan.

Posted by: spc67 at December 10, 2004 09:07 PM

Michael -

Ummm, just voted for you, and it seems that you now have 20.9% of the vote. Ain't a landslide, but it does give you the lead.



Posted by: John F. Opie at December 10, 2004 10:14 PM

Ok, this is getting annoying, Mike. Either make up some entertaining lies about Patterico or give up the feud. This is part of the bloggers by-laws for Bloggers That Don't Really Hate Oneanother.

Posted by: James Versluys at December 10, 2004 10:28 PM

Totten 21.1%
Patterico 20.7%

Posted by: Daniel Kauffman at December 11, 2004 02:53 AM

Yeah, you got my vote, MJ. Don't worry about it.

Posted by: Grant McEntire at December 11, 2004 02:58 AM


Posted by: Grant McEntire at December 11, 2004 02:59 AM

Voted for you MJT and it says you are in the lead at 21.2% or so.

As for women's underpants, there is nothing wrong there so long as you wear them on the INSIDE!


Posted by: too many steves at December 11, 2004 04:34 AM

Okay, I voted for you again but, quite frankly, this popularity contest reminds me of high school.

Posted by: Todd Pearson at December 11, 2004 07:25 AM

Actually, I never got the chance to betray him. Dammit.

I'd throw my votes to you, Michael, but every time I endorse someone, they plummet in the tallies. So I'm NOT endorsing you.

I know! I'll endorse that Patterico guy!

Posted by: Meryl Yourish at December 11, 2004 07:25 AM

Where is Jesse Jackson when you really need him? Why is he wasting time in Ohio when there are real battles to be fought? Michael Totten should offer this man of God a large donation. This will ensure his victory.

Posted by: David Thomson at December 11, 2004 08:31 AM

Splain splain splain!

Why do seemingly sane people take these web awards so seriously? Do you win a Montero, an Ipod, or dinner for two at a participating Red Lobster? Will you be permitted to have sex with starlets? ...Or maybe with the web equivalent, perhaps newby coed bloggers? Can any editor to whom you would conceivably submit a resume give rat's ass about such a contest?

I work in TV, and have no Emmy. I'm OK with that, because I make a better living than many who do have one. It's pure grease! But the way some people have been going on about this through aw/shucks half-smiles, but with tremendous ferocity is kinda disheartening.

I mean, why do you blog? I thought you wanted us to know what you think.

I thought you liked us, man.

Posted by: Cridland at December 11, 2004 09:04 AM

Allright, Totten, I'll vote for you.


PS- This morning I learned that your comment system disregards double dashes, which probably have a better name if you're an English major. But this accounts for the hard to read 'graph in above comment.

Posted by: Cridland at December 11, 2004 09:08 AM

"So come on, dearly beloved fans and antagonists. Help me out here. My gigantic ego depends on it. Vote for me. Early, late, and frequently.
Cheers. And cheers to you, too, Patterico and Meryl. You're alright - as long as you lose"!

OK !! My kind of vote.Take no prisoners and disrepect the opposition.I have voted for you so much that my voting finger is exhausted.I personally believe that it has been my votes that have put you into the lead once again,and would hope,when all the graft(I mean legitimate benefits)are distributed after your grand victory,that I am in line for a mere token of appreciation.Well actually a LARGE token would be better now that I think on it.
Good luck in your battle against those assorted pretenders to your rightful position as blogger-in-chief.

Posted by: dougf at December 11, 2004 09:41 AM

Todd Pearson: this popularity contest reminds me of high school.

As it should, Todd.

Posted by: Michael J. Totten at December 11, 2004 10:38 AM

Under these conditions, you may yet win, but it will be soooo close, will you have a mandate?

Oh, and remember, the flower goes in the front.

Posted by: Citizen Dave at December 11, 2004 10:39 AM

Why do I get the feeling that this voting is just like baseball All Star voting. Vote early. Vote often.

Posted by: Linc at December 11, 2004 11:02 AM

ok, I voted for you again. Sorry, Meryl. And I'll vote again when I get home from work.

Posted by: Maggie at December 11, 2004 11:07 AM

Hey, its working, you are in first by a nose. Now just get them to declare that the polls are closed.

Posted by: pw at December 11, 2004 11:48 AM

I heard something about Patterico that involved nakedness and Jello. Could be of use to you in your quest.

Posted by: Mike at December 12, 2004 12:19 PM

Hey, I have nothing against either nakedness or Jello, together or separately. But call me old-fashioned: I believe women's underpants should be worn by, well, women. Even -- and here I'm speaking directly to you, Michael J. Totten -- even if you do claim they're more comfortable.

Posted by: Patterico at December 12, 2004 12:44 PM

As long as I win that coveted 5th place slot, I'm ok with you winning. :-)

Posted by: Karol at December 12, 2004 12:54 PM

From LGF comments:

"12 Patterico 12/12/2004 12:57PM PST

Hey guys, it's off-topic, but hear me out now and shoot me later. I could really use your votes at the Weblog Awards. I am about 30 votes behind a liberal, out of 7300+ votes cast. Your vote for me could make a huge difference."

Pretty lame and pathetic if you ask for me? Which "liberal" were you behind again?

Posted by: Tom at December 13, 2004 11:19 AM

I blame Meryl for setting the tone, but I cop to joining in. It was funny to see that, as I was trolling for votes on LGF, Charles Johnson posted a comment saying that they should vote for Meryl because she had begged him to endorse her. I thought: she had this idea first! Good for her!

Hey, just bringing a little Rove-like tactics into internet campaigning. You gotta respect MJT's dignity in not responding in kind.

In all honesty, Michael's readers seem to think he's liberal.

P.S. The underpants thing wasn't really true. As far as I know.

Posted by: Patterico at December 14, 2004 07:29 PM

One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people.

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Winner, The 2007 Weblog Awards, Best Middle East or Africa Blog

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